Friday, February 12, 2010

Emotional Freedom

Sometimes Christians tend to think that emotions are not good.  While there is something to be said about 'emotionalism' and letting our emotions rule our experience, emotions are given as a barometer of what is going on with us.  When you look at the story of Jesus, He displayed a whole range of emotions--"Jesus wept", He threw out the money changers and He smiled upon the children who snuggled in His lap. 

Sometimes it is easier to bury our emotions than to deal with them.  I suppose that is because dealing with them can cause us to have to re-live them.  Last week, we talked about the 'emotional clearing house' of the brain which checks all incoming stimuli against our experience.  We all react differently to past pain.  Some people build emotional walls, others block out their past so that they can't recall any details, and still others wear their pain out there like little buttons just waiting for someone to push them.  None of these ways cause the person to feel free.

Several years ago, when I was able to go to counseling and come to emotional freedom, I said, "Wow! Everybody wants this!" But as time went by, I discovered that I was wrong, not everyone does want freedom---because emotional freedom comes with a price.....or should I say several prices.
  1. First, in order to be free of the pain, you have to allow yourself to feel it again. This is because the emotional part of the brain must link with the thinking part in order for freedom to be experienced. Some people don't want to pass through this---they have spent too much of their lives blocking themselves from feeling it to want to go through it or feel it again. So they go on in pain every day doing their best to hide it from others.
  2. The second price for freedom is that it doesn't come without humility.  Pride is such an emotional binder. It keeps people stuck and unable to experience emotional freedom.  The interesting thing about pride is that it has two faces.  One face is pompous and exalts itself above others and the other face is self debasing and is always putting self down low.  Both of these stem from the same root of pride.  Pride must be renounced in order to experience freedom. 
 If the desire for freedom is bigger than those two barriers, then it is possible to be free.  The problem for most people is that they don't know they way.  I know I didn't.   Desire was not enough to bring me freedom.  Then I heard about some people who were dedicating themselves to seeing other people come to freedom.  I had been to counselors before, and although I might feel somewhat free for a while, it would always come back on me.  But this gave me hope.

When I went there and shared my story, I had never had anyone care about it the way that these people did.  And it was not just 'put on'---they genuinely cared about my story.  When I was able to share it all, they then took me to Jesus for each point of pain.  One by one the burdens fell off as Jesus took them.  I walked away such a different person that for one week afterwords other people were asking me, "What happened to you?"  I had not only come face to face with the things that had emotionally bound me, but I had also met Jesus as the only One who can bring emotional freedom.

If you are struggling and really have a heart desire for freedom, please contact me.  I would love to walk with you on the path to emotional freedom.

~Cindy Lou~

Inspired by Heart to Heart with Holley

Friday, February 5, 2010

A Restorer of Paths to Dwell In

     "And you shall be called, 'The restorer of paths to dwell in.'  This is God's promise to those who follow Him.  The path toward emotional healing is sometimes difficult to find...and there are not that many people out there who are true 'restorers'.  I suppose that is because we misunderstand the ministry of Jesus and fail to follow His example.  When someone is hurting it is uncomfortable.  We may want to 'fix' it, but we just don't know how.   
     Looking unto Jesus we find that the way that He dealt with people nearly always cut to the quick.  It was almost like He wanted to hear their story, and to care about their pain.  In fact, this is what was prophesied of Him..."A bruised reed shall He not break, and smoking flax shall He not quench, till He send forth judgment unto victory."  Jesus wants us to have victory in our lives and He is not one to wound the wounded, but always brings healing to those who affirmatively answer his probing question, "Wilt thou be made whole?" 
     I like to think of those 'paths' that Jesus wants for us to dwell in to be the neurological paths of our minds.  The  Bible says, "But be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind."  For many people there are things that keep this transformation from taking place.  Often, it is in the form of abuse---physical, sexual, emotional or spiritual.  
     I was talking with my brother on the phone earlier this evening.  He is currently visiting in the country of Nepal.  He was telling me about people in that country who believe that they are of a caste who don't have a right not to be beaten.  In other words, the social system they live in has ingrained in their minds that they are so low that others who are above them have the right to inflict bodily harm to them.  My brother is a soft-hearted individual and it is really difficult for him to watch others be mistreated and even more painful to him to think that some people truly believe that they deserve poor treatment.  But this is the nature of the world in which we live.
     How is it possible to change those pathways of the mind and 'renew' our minds bringing about transformation?  The human brain actually has three parts, the cortex (marked in blue), the lymbic system (red) and the brain stem (green).  The lymbic system is the emotional center of the brain.  It is like the emotional clearing house for all incoming stimuli.  When we get hurt emotionally, the emotional pain can become lodged there for a lifetime.  One of the reasons psychologists use talk therapy in helping people overcome the pain of their past is because language is created in the cortex.  Although the emotional part of the brain understands language, it cannot produce it.  That is why many times when we begin to talk about the things that hurt so deeply, the tears flow freely.  Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to think that tears are something to hide, something to pass tissue for....'Here, wipe that away!'  But we are rarely willing to share the tissue box with another---I mean, we will give it to them, but we don't often take every other tissue as they describe their pain to wipe the tears from our own eyes. 
     The path to emotional freedom is best walked hand in hand with another who really cares.  For me it was Catherine and Jack who were willing to take my hand and without crushing this bruised reed were able to lead me to judgment and victory.  I still struggle.  But I know that Jesus is beside me ready to tell me my story and rewrite the ending with glorious hope.  You are writing your story every day too.  Why not become a restorer of paths to dwell in,  by walking through someone's pain with them? 

~Cindy Lou Bailey

Inspired by Heart to Heart with Holley

Friday, January 29, 2010

Trait Expression


This week I have been following a blog titled, "Heart to Heart with Holley" It has been such a blessing and I wanted to share some concepts with you here that Holley has shared on her blog. She writes, "Stephen Covey once said, "When you pick up a stick, you get both ends." In our stories, a "stick" might look like...

Trait Stick

Anxiety...............Sensitivity.....................Compassion

Sensitivity in itself is a neutral personality trait. On our own it can lead us toward worry (negative). With Jesus it can lead us toward compassion (positive)." (Heart to Heart with Holley)

This makes so much sense. When I was young, I was fainthearted. I passed out three different times when visiting friends who had been admitted to the hospital. The sight of IVs in people's arms and the hearing of the accidents that placed them in their hospital bed just made me queezy and faint and I would find myself smelling a strange mixture under the bright lights of the ER. Who would have thought that I could ever work in a hospital?

But, God turned my life so that I did that very thing. When I was completing my undergraduate degree in psychology, I did my internship as a hospital chaplain. When I started, I asked God to give me His compassion and He answered that prayer. I found myself not only visiting patients and hearing their stories, but also holding their hands while the nurses threaded IVs and did other procedures that caused patient anxiety.

In our DNA we all have traits that are expressed and genes that are recessive. It makes sense that the same would be true of behavioral traits. Notice on Holley's model above that the trait on the one end is a trait that is expressed when one is focused on self and the one on the other end the same trait is expressed another way when the focus is on Christ or others.

All of us have one thing that we have absolute control over and that is what we give our attention to. What we choose to focus on can make all the difference. This week I have been teaching my fifteen-year-old son how to drive. We have talked a lot about focus because drivers tend to drive or drift toward what they focus on. This is why it is so important in night driving to watch that white line when passing other vehicles.

If we focus on Christ, we will continually stear towards Him and the behavioral traits that we express will be those that communicate Him to the world.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Feeling Right about Doing Wrong: The Neurobiology of Moral Dilemmas


The human mind and brain are distinctly different from that of any other creature on the planet. While other mammals share similarities in brain structure, it has long been recognized that the moral nature of man is a distinguishing characteristic of human beings. What exactly makes humans moral creatures? Is there something distinctive in the brain, perhaps a ‘God spot’ that causes man to make choices that are moral in nature?

The idea of a so-called ‘God spot’ has been entertained and studied by scientists who are seeking to understand the moral nature of man. Robert Lee Holz in his Wall Street Journal article states that if you, “knock out certain brain cells with an aneurysm or a tumor…while everything else may appear normal, the ability to think straight about some issues of right and wrong has been permanently skewed.” (Holz, 2007) As the article suggests, this points to a neurobiological basis for moral decision-making.

And this is not a new concept. In the year 1848 railroad foreman Phineas P. Gage had an accident involving a three-foot long tamping iron, which set off a charge of dynamite sending the iron rod through his head. The iron entered his left cheek below his eye and came out the top of his head toward the right side passing behind his eye and landing some 80 feet from Gage. Although he never lost consciousness, Gage lost his moral nature. He went from being a responsible foreman who was serious and energetic, to not caring much about anything, frequenting bars and being loud-mouthed and vulgar. He also became childish, irresponsible and thoughtless of others (Carlson, 2005, p. 301). Gage’s doctor reported him as being ‘irreverent’ (Panksepp, 2003, p. 549). While there are differing theories as to the exact angle the iron passed through Gage’s head, it is certain that his moral nature was altered by the accident.
Recent studies have shown that the area responsible for the choices found in moral dilemmas is the part of the brain called the ventral medial prefrontal cortex (VMPFC) (Talmi & Frith, 2007, p. 865). Talmi & Frith demonstrate that this area also directly communicates with parts of the brain responsible for emotions and that moral dilemmas are judged differently depending on how directly the individual must come into contact with the victim (p. 865).

Moral dilemmas, while they are termed ‘moral’ are actually a choice between two immoral actions, the choice between the lesser of two evils, which are both a violation of conscience (Talmi & Frith, p. 865). This is what makes the choice a ‘dilemma’ because human beings have a conscience that causes them to desire to choose the right.

In the early 1970s, university students were given a moral dilemma involving a boat filled with people both young and old, and were asked to solve a problem of the boat being overloaded by determining whom they would choose to eliminate. Being bright young scholars, the students did some mathematical calculations along with some physics on weight distribution and discovered that tossing a shipmate was not necessary. But their professor was not pleased with their final project and failed them. Charlotte Thomson Iserbyt (1999) relates the preceding story in her book, The Deliberate Dumbing Down of America and uses it to illustrate how American education has shifted from being ‘academic’ in nature to being what she terms ‘values education.’ (Iserbyt, 1999, p. xxv) Because of the nature of education itself, the teaching of values is an important part of the educational process. However, if moral dilemmas are really the choice between two immoral actions, how can giving students these kinds of problems improve their morality? Such dilemmas, which ask participants to take one life to spare many might seem to some as sound judgment, however, often when the same dilemma is stated in an alternate way, the individual who said it would be OK to ‘flip a switch’ wouldn’t deliberately take a life to spare another or others.

Caiaphas was high priest the year that Jesus was brought to trial. He wanted to be rid of Christ and he rationalized that taking one life would be better than many dying. He spoke at the counsel and said, “Ye know nothing at all, nor consider that it is expedient for us, that one man should die for the people, and that the whole nation perish not” (John 11:49 & 50). The book of John reports that in saying this Caiaphas prophesied as to the significance of the death of Christ and how His death was indeed so that many could live. “So Christ was once offered to bear the sins of many” (Heb. 9: 28). The moral choice Caiaphas made regarding Jesus, placed him in the group of those who pierced Christ that will be raised to see the brightness of His coming (Rev. 1:7).

It is important to note that morality is not merely a matter of neural wiring. As Derek Sankey questions, if all brain activity can be reduced to brain function, why does it matter if we give moral education (Sankey, 2006)? In other words, Sankey is questioning the purpose of education in morality if everything can be reduced to brain function itself and not on the choice of the one doing the thinking. Because man is a tri-part being having physical, mental and spiritual natures, it would be wrong to attribute morality as a kind of ‘hard-wiring’ or something that does not involve personal choice. The presentation of moral dilemmas demonstrates that morality involves personal choice and studies show that these choices involve several brain areas including the emotional part of the brain (Talmi & Frith, 2007, p. 865).

Melanie Killen and Judith Smetana (2007) in their journal article, The Biology of Morality: Human Development and Moral Neuroscience, state that “It is not enough to know that an act is judged as good or bad; the ‘moral’ litmus test lies with the reasons why it is viewed as good or bad, right or wrong” (p. 242, italics in original). If we leave morality up to human reasons or reasoning, then the answers to moral questions will always vary and morality will be a nebulous construct. There has to be a moral standard.

For example, a young girl can use contraceptives to prevent a pregnancy or choose to have an abortion if these don’t work; and if there is nothing immoral about premarital intercourse or killing an unborn child, the reasons these things are termed ‘good’ or ‘bad’ just turn out to be human reasons and will change according to who is asked. But if there is a moral standard, which states that adultery and murder are wrong, then the reason is not based on one human’s reason pitted against another.

Derek Sankey in his article in the Journal of Moral Education (2006) suggests that perhaps the answers to such moral questions “should be framed within the context of theology and notions of sin and redemption” (p. 163). He suggests that we are either created a little lower than the angels or else we are evolved to a position a little above apes (p. 164). He himself takes the later position. However, if we are evolved a little higher than apes, then angels are just imaginary religious fairies and do not exist. But if we were created by a Supreme Being to be a little lower than heavenly beings called ‘angels’ (ps. 8:5) then our moral nature is more than certain brain wiring and the moral standard is the law of this Holy God.

Sankey points out that, “Many in neuroscience believe that all human experience will eventually be accounted for in terms of the activity of the brain” (p.163) Sankey points out that if we accept this view, we are headed for a “singly deterministic notion of self, devoid of even the possibility of making choices” (p. 163). While it is true that structure determines function, because humans are self-determined, the choices we make every day about what we eat, drink and even think are also restructuring our brains and impacting the way that they function. Ratey (2001, p. 17) states that, “Our own free will may be the strongest force directing the development of our brains.” We are all faced every day with decisions about how to care for our bodies and our minds. This is affected not only by what we ingest, but also by what we mentally consume.
‘Keep thy heart with all diligence,’ is the counsel of the wise man; ‘for out of it are the issues of life.’ As man ‘thinketh in his heart, so is he.’ The heart must be renewed by divine grace, or it will be in vain to seek for purity of life. He who attempts to build up a noble, virtuous character independent of the grace of Christ, is building his house upon the shifting sand…Guard well the avenues of the soul…avoid reading, seeing, or hearing that which will suggest impure thoughts (White, 1930, p. 286).

Thus, it is impossible to live a moral life without the working of God’s grace upon the heart. This process of moral change in the heart cannot be explained philosophically. Jesus said, “The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit.…Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit..” (John 3: 8 & 6, NIV) Sankey points out that, “Neuroscience cannot, of course, answer questions of right and wrong, but it can contribute to a deep understanding of personhood, decision making and social behavior, and it is important for moral and values educators.” (p. 168) It is equally important to the Christian educator to determine whether the moral and values education being given is ministering not only to the mind and body, but also to the spirit.


Reference:
Carlson, N. R., (2005) Foundations of physiological psychology, 6th ed. Boston: Allyn & Bacon.
Holz, R. L., (2007) Scientist draw link between morality and brain’s wiring. The Wall Street Journal, Online Science Journal, Retrieved on May 20, 2009 from: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB117884235401499300.html#printMode
Iserbyt, C. T., (1999) The deliberate dumbing down of America. Ravenna, OH: Conscience Press.
Killen, M., & Smetana, J., (2007) The biology of morality: Human development and moral neuroscience. Human Development 50 (1) 241-243.
New King James Version, (1982) Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, Inc.
Panksepp, J., (2003) Textbook of biological psychiatry. Wilmington, DE: Wiley-Liss.
Ratey, J. (2001) A user’s guide to the brain. New York: Abacus.
Sankey, D., (2006) The neuronal, synaptic self: Having values and making choices. Journal of Moral Education 35 (2) 163-178.
Talmi, D., & Frith, C., (2007) Feeling right about doing right. Nature (April 19, 2007) 865-866.
White, E. G., (1930) Messages to young people. Nampa, ID: Pacific Press.